Not Gone, Just Changed: What I Believe Happens When We Die

People sometimes ask me, “What do you think happens when we die?”It’s not an easy question, but it’s one I’ve spent a lot of time sitting with.

Through my experiences, I’ve come to believe that death is not the end. The people we’ve loved and lost don’t just disappear. Something of them—who they are, their love, their essence—continues on in a real and meaningful way.

I don’t say that lightly. I say it because I’ve felt it. Because again and again, I’ve witnessed moments that point to something beyond this life—something that doesn’t end when the body does.

They are not gone.They are just changed.

What Spirit Has Shown Me

When a spirit comes through, there’s a peacefulness that enters with them. It’s hard to describe, but it’s unmistakable. Their presence is calm, loving, and deeply aware.

They often acknowledge how they lived—the choices they made, the people they hurt or helped. But they don’t bring shame or regret the way we often carry it. Instead, there’s a kind of clarity. They see things now that they couldn’t see then, and they often want to share that insight with the living. Not to cause pain—but to bring healing, understanding, and love.

What stands out the most is that they are still themselves. Their personality, their humor, their way of being—it all comes through. But there’s a softness, too. An expansion. As if they’ve stepped into a wider, more loving perspective.

A Note on Spirits Who Haven’t Fully Moved On

While most spirits I encounter feel peaceful and fully transitioned, there have been rare times when a spirit seems different—unsettled, confused, or still tied to something unresolved.

These moments are rare, and I don’t claim to fully understand them. The energy feels heavier, more rooted in the material world, like they haven’t completely crossed into that place of peace. It doesn’t feel threatening, but it does feel different.

When that happens, I meet them with the same compassion and care as any other spirit. I believe healing is possible for all souls, even if their path looks different. And while I don’t have all the answers, I trust that love and understanding are always available—even in those liminal spaces.

This is something I hope to explore more deeply in a future post.

What the Research Suggests

While mediumship is often seen as a spiritual or intuitive practice, there’s also a growing body of scientific inquiry that supports some of what mediums experience:

• Near-death experiences (NDEs) often include vivid accounts of consciousness continuing after clinical death—people report floating above their bodies, encountering loved ones, and feeling overwhelming peace.

• Shared death experiences suggest that even people near someone who is dying can glimpse aspects of their transition—seeing light, hearing messages, or feeling a presence leave the room.

• Researchers like Dr. Sam Parnia, Dr. Pim van Lommel, and Dr. Bruce Greyson have explored these experiences through the lens of neuroscience and consciousness studies, suggesting that the mind may not be confined to the brain.

• Consciousness theories in quantum physics and neuroscience propose that what we call the “self” may be nonlocal—existing beyond physical matter and interacting with reality in ways we’re only beginning to understand.

• Mediumship studies, such as those by the Windbridge Research Center, have shown that certain mediums can provide accurate information under controlled, blinded conditions—offering compelling data that suggests access to information beyond ordinary means.

Additionally, studies of brainwaves and altered states show that deep meditation, trance, and other practices can help people enter states where intuitive or non-ordinary perception is heightened. This may explain how mediums access information from what some describe as a higher or parallel frequency.

All of this doesn’t "prove" what happens after death—but it does open the door. It suggests we’re only scratching the surface of what consciousness is, and where it may go when it leaves the body.

Love Doesn’t Die

Through all of this—spiritual and scientific alike—one truth keeps rising to the surface:Love continues.

The connection between you and the people you’ve lost doesn’t end with death. The bond, the care, the love—it’s still alive. It shows up in subtle ways: in dreams, in signs, in quiet moments of knowing.

And more often than not, when spirit reaches out, it’s not to dwell on the pain of their passing. It’s to say:I’m still here. I still love you. I haven’t gone far.

An Invitation to Trust

You don’t have to believe everything I say. You don’t have to agree with every idea. But I invite you to stay open—to notice what you’ve felt or experienced in your own life that maybe didn’t have an explanation.

That whisper in your heart. That dream that felt different. That sudden memory that made you stop and feel their presence again.

You’re not imagining it. You’re not making it up. You’re not alone.

Those we love are not gone. They’re just changed. And in that change, they remain close—still loving us, still guiding us, still finding ways to let us know:Love doesn’t die.